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Quick tips for terminating trainspeak in copywriting 27 July 2011

Is something railroading your copy? There was a good article at the start of this week in The Guardian about the perils of railspeak.

The long(winded) journey
We’ve probably all experienced this often absurdly complicated way of conveying a message. It’s a world where the simplest act is described in the most long winded of ways. It’s similar to how some businesses continue to communicate in robot copy instead of speaking their customer’s language.

Perhaps it’s all because the railway powers-that-be want to give their language the supposed protection of ‘officialese’. Of course there is a place for official messages, but surely when you’re directly addressing people, there should be an end to the train speak?

All change! Quick tips for terminating trainspeak in copywriting:

• Think of your audience (whether they’re passengers on the 14.52 to Waterloo or not) and deliver direct to them.

• Don’t go the long route. Take the quickest, simplest journey to your point – making sure you retain your core message.

• Don’t be cruel to language. Overcomplex sentences and odd turns of phrase can create more of a distance between you and your reader.

• Inject some humanity. Some documents demand an official distance. Others don’t. Have a think about where your own copy could benefit from some added warmth and friendliness.

• Remind people you’re there for them – not the other way round. If you’re selling a service, you want your copy to encourage people to feel that you’re on their side.

• Don’t overdo it. As I’ve said many times on this blog, less is truly more when it comes to copywriting. Unlike the trainworld, keep your communications timed at pleasantly spaced out intervals. Information overload muddles the message.

Camilla Zajac, Green Light Copywriting, July 2011